Pregnant and confused please help?

Im 21 years old and im 14 weeks pregnant initially i thought i was happy and i was keeping it only being with my current partner for 4 months however it was like a light inside me was going out i was slowly loosing my sparkle and loosing control of my life. My parents were not to happy about the situation however accepted it. My fammily and my boyfriend really did not get on at all my dad and him had constant arguments as my boyfriend would goad him but they let by gons be by gons and gave things another shot then whilst at a family doo he kicked off again big time and did some really unplesant things towards the family however we could not let my father see what was going on as it would result in ww3! the day after i decided to end it with him and have a termination. i felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. but it wasnt long before i was contacting him again as i missed him tremendously. for the past 3 weeks now we have been on and off and i can not decide wether to keep the baby or not i cant bare to go through a termination however i do not think i can rais a child either. i want my child to have the best of everything like i had and i dont think i can provide that not only that but i dont think i am grown up enough for the responsibility my head is pounding im tired and i do not see a way out i cant talk to anyone about my feelings as i have trouble opening up to people everyone around me says i am a different person to what i used to be and that i need to see a doctor and they all say terminate and leave him i will get over it but i dont think that i will. I was on the pill when i became pregnant and hadnt missed any i guess i was that small percent please can someone give me the wake up call i need!